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| I felt it time for a new update. Life's been good, but I miss my Dio, Bullock, and Chasathan. On the upside, my life has been awesome. School is tough, but I feel like I can over come it. My research is fun; a lot of fun. One-acts are coming up, and I'm training the heir to improv. I miss Preston, Eric, Morgan...the list goes on. Davy, Matt, Joe, John, Johnny...it only gets longer...Sean, definitely Sean, and Gnatt. I'll have more to say later...I'm too lazy right now.
Me Enamora by Juanes
Cada Blanco de mi mente
se vuelve color con verte
Y el deseo de tenerte,
es más fuerte es más fuerte
Solo quiero que me lleves
De tu mano por la senda,
Y atravesar el bosque
que divide nuestras vidas.
Hay tantas cosas
que me gustan hoy de tí
Me enamora
Que me hables con tu boca
Me enamora
Que me eleves hasta el cielo
Me enamora
Que de mi sea tu alma soñadora.
Esperanza de mis ojos
Sin ti mi vida no tiene sentido
Sin ti mi vida es como un remolino
De cenizas que se van (ooooh)
volando con el viento.....
Yo no se si te merezco
Solo sé que aun deseo
Que le des luz a mi vida
En los días venideros
Léeme muy bien los labios
Te lo digo bien despacio.
Por el resto de mis días
Quiero ser tu compañía.
Hay tantas cosas
que me gustan hoy de ti...
Me enamora
Que me hables con tu boca
Me enamora
Que me eleves hasta el cielo
Me enamora
Que de mi sea tu alma soñadora.
La esperanza de mis ojos
Sin ti mi vida no tiene sentido
Sin ti mi vida es como un remolino
De cenizas que se van (ooooh)
Me enamora
Que me hables con tu boca
Me enamora
Que me eleves hasta el cielo
Me enamora
Que de mi sea tu alma soñadora.
La esperanza de mis ojos
Sin ti mi vida no tiene sentido
Sin ti mi vida es como un remolino
De cenizas que se van (ooooh)
volando con el viento.....
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| This last week has been horrible. I've had good moments, I've had great moments, but none of these erases the pain I'm feeling. I don't know what to do. i had everything going on last week, so I could escape the pain, if only for just a bit, but even that's not here anymore.
A false pretense-rather, a mask that none could remove...
I guess now I just have to face the pain. It's way too much right now, and while I know where it's stemming from, I can't, rather I don't want to cut this off. I just keep hoping, and praying. Things aren't right for me. Some words thrown around that shouldn't have been. I just wish it would rain. I can't cry, but I want to, so badly.
Tears from the sky will suffice, when these tears of mine refuse to fall...
Whoever said that actions speak louder than words, wasn't me.
An echo, only, but present nonetheless...
The one thing that keeps running through my head is the first dream I've remembered in a long time, rather was the first one I'd had in a long time. I was just sitting...angry, hurt, sad...and all I did was yell.
No discernible word passed from my lips,
but the sound of pain rang clearer than all else...
I kept yelling, until blood was coming out of my mouth. Even then, I did not stop. The pain would stop flowing out, and I just didn't want to feel it anymore. For the first time since my father and I had a falling out, I cried. I tried to hide it from my friends in the car, but I cried.
And though one could discern the reason,
The pain shone through...
What is this feeling? Why am I feeling it? Will it stop? What do I have to do? Keep me in your prayers, please...
http://www.plyrics.com/lyrics/avengedsevenfold/almosteasy.html
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/backstreetboys/showmethemeaningofbeinglonely.html
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| So, it's been awhile. I don't know where to begin, let alone where it's all going to end. Everything is up in a tizzy now. My parents' are having problems with me, and with each other it would seem. Let's recap the summer so far. It started off as a relaxer: no job, no responsibilities. It all seemed to good to be true. I quickly took my job at Gabe's again, thinking the internship wouldn't be too far behind. They lose two transcripts, along with my proof of enrollment. That's 30 dollars down the drain. It started off smooth for Merc, and I, but quickly turned for the worse. At a few points, it got so bad that I thought about just leaving the whole thing. It hurt me a lot, and caused me a lot of unnecessary pain, but I stuck through it. Things got better, then worse, and now they're at their best. We went to Cape May back in July. Me, Merc, Davy, Renee, Eric, Matt, and Capri. It was a good trip...minus the constant fighting for the first day and a half. Despite the early drama, we made the best fire ever. Davy made a magical magnesium pit, I burnt the weirdest freaking bug ever, and Matt told us the difference between a monsoon, and a mongoose. Apparently, one's a big wind...and the other isn't. Confused? I know. Lots of daddy long legs...I hate them...one as big as my fist. Anyways, there was the 20's party, the weekend before. Lots of fun. Gun check, dancing, and mafia. I loved every second of it, but unfortunately, I've worked almost every, single, freaking night of this summer because my boss is a retarded jerkoff, who thinks I don't have a life outside of my damn job. I miss Johnny, and Ebbets never has time when I do. Diodato, and I don't get enough awesome time, and Chase can NEVER hang out. Davy, and Matt are in Pittsburgh, and the Gaugers both work now. Preston, I need to make a better effort to hang with him. If it weren't for him, and his family, I wouldn't know anything about acting or singing. God blessed me with their introduction to my life. Sean...I miss him the most, only because I've seen him once the whole summer. I work nights, and he works weekends, so he doesn't get to do much when I can. Paul hangs with the Marching band kids, while Hamen hangs with the ex-drumline guys. Tim and Laina...not sure how to explain, but I'm truly happy for them...one of my favorite couples. Kara...don't hear from her. People who were my friends, I'd rather not re-introduce to my life, only because they've made a major change for the worse, and I don't feel like dealing with extra baggage that ensues. Talked to Lindsay tonight, however short it was, it was still fun. Searching to make sure I got everything off of my chest so I don't dwell, and contemplate...
...
...
want to visit Davy next week...
parents having marital problems...
new diet makes me feel really good...
good girlfriend situation...
Ran into Katie Fredrick...
Old crushes have crushes on me now, however I want nothing to do with them...
no problems with ex-gf's...
Jeremy's a pain...
Josh surgery...
pissed at John(BOSS)...
Going to school soon...
Miss my school boys like mad...
Get Dan some chucks...
Party with Ragu...
Game with Anthony...
Stuff Xin Yi in trash can...
this has turned into a to-do list...
Tell Xuan she isn't fat...
"OH JAM" Nikolai...
Pow-wow with the Asians...
Meet up with Dan Camponova...
Beat Jerin...
Meet with the council...
That's about it...
now for a song...
"The Ultimate Victory" by Chamillionaire
[Intro]
I'ma thank you, when and what the album almost through
Thanks, I ain't never had a fan like you
Eazy E, Left Eye and Aaliyah too
Pac, Biggie, Hawk, Fat Pat and DJ Screw
I wanna thank you
(Thanks for opening my eyes and helping me to realize
That tomorrow ain't promised, Gotta live your life to the fullest
What's life if you ain't enjoying it, Know what I'm talking bout?)
My purpose really used to be so unclear
Science fiction with the swagger, it's so unreal
So fly that my nickname should be up here
Looking up is the only time when I appear
I'm a spartan, go ahead and throw your spear
Slap failure in the face and still show no fear
They say no show but I show like chea
The Champ's here, let the whole crowd know my cheer (Victory!)
The media, they write about you in the mags
Spread rumors about your life and break you is the task
I know one of my three publicists will ruin my chance
To let me let you know that I don't like you in advance
But I thank you and I extend their thanks too
To everybody saying stuff you know ain't true
You need to go and find god like Mase too
But just stay there with him and try and stay you
Getting away is important
I can pull a couple strings like a guitar hand
Better yet, bring out the whole guitar band
Grab grain, you can swang somewhere like Tarzan
I swear to y'all, the rap game really making me sick
The record industry's your home then I came to prevent
Put some nonsense out and I bet cha this one will stick
Or put some real music out and I'm probably gonna catch a brick
Brick on top of brick, we'll build a house
Tell whoever said that, I'm still filled with doubt
Told me I'm in the right hole and then sealed it out
Told me I'm on the right track and then killed my route
Ouch, you never miss a good thing til it's gone
Yeah, the flow is so fluid, it's like drinking a song
Don't get the track mister wrong, this ain't even a song
This is a beat that I must release therapy on
Everybody saying that they wanna see me successful
Came into the game but now I'm feeling let's go
Intimate moments never seem to be special
If you jet, then you can bet I'm disappearing like Crisco
Ala Kazaam, I ain't mad at the fans
I ain't mad at the man, they both scattered my brand
Never will understand what really matters to Cham
So matter of fact, the title is just a matter of plan (Victory!)
After revenge, it's the victory right
Well the final run's done and this the victory hype
Now that everybody's present and this victory night
Let me repaint the pic, they wasn't depicting me right
(Now Whatchu mean?) Tell the world that I'm more than just a grill
Show you how to put cha hands on more than a wood wheel
If that's all you hearing, then let me just be for real
Take your contract, the hell with a record deal
Keep thinking I'm gonna lose if you want to
Bet the tenth time, it more like a Yukon groove
That's why I always have to make the move on fools
Back on my feet like I got two gun shoes
Yeah, why you think Em probably going all crazy?
So why you think Britney Spears going bout baby?
Interview me, you think you know it all lady
I'm out of here, yeah but not before y'all pay me
Thank you
(I appreciate it
You know I'm used to power, respect and a million dollar check to do what I wanna do
And right now, I'm fitting to take a vacation
A real vacation though, Haha)
This the outro, I was gonna put it at the beginning
But this is what I say the moment after I'm winning
(Thank you, Ultimate Victory) | | |
| Should I, or should I not? You answer the question...
"Save Us" by Cartel
Simple words we never knew,
The power behind what they put us through,
Now it's all begun
What it takes to make it real.
We're standing on the edge of this,
When our soul is gone what will we miss?
We lost what it takes to really make it feel.
But the better days behind us now,
We all need someone to tell us how
To save the state of where we are,
It keeps demanding more and more and more.
And who will save us?
This can't go on, without the meaning in the rhyming.
Can you save, and can you save us?
Oh I can't go on out of rhythm with our time.
We hold these truths self evident,
The lies we used to represent
Who we are, because it was never meant to be.
And all the songs we used to sing, they used to tell us everything.
All about how it was never meant to be.
But the better days behind us now.
We all need someone to tell us how
To save the state of where we are,
It keeps demanding more and more and more.
And who will save us?
This can't go on, without the meaning in the rhyming.
Can you save, and can you save us?
Oh I can't go on out of rhythm with our time.
Say the words, give it all the time you need.
Let it out, oh, just say anything.
Say the words and make them count,
Say them loud without a doubt.
Give us truth and nothing more,
Leave us wanting more and more.
Can you save us?
This can't go on, without the meaning in the rhyming.
Can you say, that you'll save us?
Oh I can't go on, out of rhythm with our time.
And can you say, you say, you'll save us?
I can't go on, without the meaning in the rhyming.
Can you say, that you'll save us?
Oh I can't go on, out of rhythm with our time.
We're out of rhythm with our time.
| | |
| And a conflicted heart stands amidst the rubble
Worrying if it can rebuild what once stood before him
A tower of strength, and power, undone
Left for ruin, just as it had once begun
Stepping forward from among the stone
And never once looking down at what once was his home
Wearily stand to your feet, and receive the cold chill upon your face
The wintry kiss of love, and now loss, leaves you empty with it's empty embrace
The eloquence, and beauty of this beautiful disaster
Sings a song of sorrow, and yet joy still
Whilst the songbirds chirp, and the howling wind sings
Stand in the blanket of night, and the twilight chill
Live on, and rebuild upon the tatters that were your heart
Leave the spectres of the past with the coming of the sun
Step into the enveloping warmth of new light
And let it lift you from your sorrow, and plight
"Rainy Day" by Guster
I will dig a hole
Save my pennies for a rainy day
I will dig a hole
Savin pennies for a rainy day
I'm not scared
I will build a wall
Sensing trouble from a mile away
I will build a wall
Saw it comin from a mile away
I'm not scared
I'm not scared
Try when your inside's out
I don't even try, I know I have seen the best I'll have
I don't even try
I will just play dumb
I won't hear a single word that's said
I will bite my tongue
Never sing another song again
I'm not scared
I'm not scared
Try wearing my insides out
I don't even try, I know I have seen the best I'll have
I don't even try
Never been one to take my chances
I don't even try
Clouds are comin
Air get's heavy
Looks like trouble on a rainy day
Sun starts sinking
Can't see my shadow
Looks like trouble on a rainy day
Holes uncovered
Walls will crumble
All spells trouble on a rainy day Learn To Fly by Foo Fighters
Run and tell all of the angels
This could take all night
Think I need a devil to help me get things right
Hook me up a new revolution
Cause this one is a lie
We sat around laughing and watched the last one die
I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright
I'm looking for complication
Looking cause I'm tired of trying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly
I think I'm done nursing the patience
I can wait one night
I'd give it all away if you give me one last try
We'll live happily ever trapped if you just save my life
Run and tell the angels that everything is alright..
Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone
Try and make this life my own "Sakura Drops" by Utada Hikaru
Koi wo shite owari wo tsuge
Chikau koto wa: kore ga saigo no heartbreak
Sakura sae kaze no naka de yurete
Yagate hana wo sakasu yo Furidashita natsu no ame ga
Namida no yoko wo tootta suutto
Omoide to daburu eizou
Aki no dorama saihousou Doushite onaji you na panchi
Nandomo kuratchaun da
Sore demo mata tatakaun darou
Sore ga inochi no fushigi Koi wo shite subete sasage
Negau koto wa: kore ga saigo no heartbreak
Sakura sae toki no naka de yurete
Yagata hana wo sakasu yo Kurikaesu kisetsu no naka de
Kutsu ga surihetteku Motto kata no chikara nuite
Kako wa dokoka ni shimatte oke
Koko kara sou tooku nai darou
Mita koto mo nai keshiki Tomaranai mune no itami koete
Motto kimi ni chikazukitai yo
Hitomawari shite wa modori
Aoi sora wo zutto tesaguri Koi wo shite owari wo tsuge
Chikau koto wa: kyou ga saisho no good day
Sakura made kaze no naka de yurete
Sotto kimi ni te wo nobasu yo Suki de suki de doushiyou mo nai
Sore to kore to wa kankei nai
translations:http://www.kiwi-musume.com/lyrics/hikki/deepriver/sakuradrops.htm
what I'm listening to now: http://www.kiwi-musume.com/lyrics/uverworld/timeless/d-tecnolife.html | | |
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